this temptation

We got back from NFA yesterday after driving through the night in a too-small car. Needless to say, I spent most of the time since catching up on sleep, avoiding automobiles at all costs, and being spoiled by Jon. Apparently I was missed.

I wound up breaking to Quarterfinals in Info. Very surprising since I'd spent the entire ride down to NFA memorizing my new Info, and yet I decided to do the old one 30 minutes before the round started. Curt was pretty pissed that I'd changed the plan at the last minute, but he can't complain. I was the only break our team had. I can't possibly convey the depth of my sadness upon not breaking in Persuasion, Crit, or Poetry. I was initially merely confused, but as the realization set in that this had been my last chance to get out in college forensics, the tears became hard to fight. And while I had promised Jon that I wouldn't call crying and blubbering, I couldn't help it. I've never wanted anything that badly, and not getting it was just too painful.

Georgia was beautiful. The people were fascinating, and even though we didn't bring a big team, I still managed to have fun. My camera is filled with photos of the trees, rivers, houses, churches and gravestones we found. Visually, this was the most enjoyable tournament I've been to. I would go back Rome in a heartbeat.

So I leave tomorrow for IOA. My last tournament as a competitor. My favorite event. No pressure.

I walked outside this morning to discover that it was snowing. In April. And 2 weeks ago I was bouncing around in shorts and tank tops. Crazy.

I saw some old high school friends at the Mudlounge last night. I love being able to reconnect with my old buds and see how they're doing, and it makes me really happy to see that they're doing well. Oh, and I'm probably the only person ever to get excited about this, but I witnessed real live karaoke for the very first time. It was just as I had imagined it. If only I had the guts to get up there myself...

Okay, so Thursday was my boss's birthday. I didn't know about it until 5pm that evening because as I was sitting at my desk, happily typing addresses, he invited one of my co-workers over to his house Friday evening for a birthday party. He also explained that everyone else would be there. He said nothing to me about it. Acted like I wasn't even in the room. So I went about my merry way, finishing up my work, and then I ran home and called Jon to make plans for Friday night. I wasn't mad, per se, but I did feel a bit snubbed being the only one not invited. No worries, though. I found out today that Aaron went to the party. That's why I wasn't invited. Kinda sucks that I got left out, but I'm glad I was spared the awkwardness that would have surely ensued.

So last night, Jon and I went to Gallery Bistro. I puffy heart their Chicken Rosemary. Yum! We also grabbed drinks at the MudLounge before finding Lauren at the Outland where Justin's band was playing. It was a pretty cool show, but the entire time I was really nervous that the floor would collapse. I worry about really dumb things.

I also found out last night that Ben isn't going to NFA. Yet another person I won't get to hang out with at Nationals. This sucks.

Okay, I have to admit that my recent happiness has faded a bit. Don't get me wrong, I'm still plenty happy, it's just that I'm realizing that this is my new normal. And I pray that this normal never gets boring.

I don't really know how to explain the recent lack of blog posts. I guess it's probably because there's so much of my life that I'd like to remain private. Or maybe it's because things have been happening that I can't really explain and don't know how to feel about.

I've been pretty bummed recently about certain individuals quitting the Drury debate team. I know that we'll always be friends and I wish them luck on whatever team they find themselves on, but it breaks my heart that I've worked for the past three years to build up a team, only to watch it crumble before my eyes. I'm afraid that there might not be anyone for me to coach next year, because I love forensics more than anything and I still want to be involved even if I'm not competing. Hopefully we'll get some freshmen next year.